I have a confession. I love parenting books. Like love love them. You're right, i don't have kids yet. But as we could literally be matched any day now, I want to be prepared. One of the weirdest things about adoption is that we don't get a typical 9-month gestation period. Next week will mark a year since filing our application. That's a long time to wait, but we also know that this is not atypical for adoptive families. Since it gives us a good bit of time to prepare, sometimes the nesting comes in phases - oooh, let's organize all the things today, rearrange the closet next week, but then not touch it for a couple of months lest I have a meltdown. It's really weird, y'all.
In the meantime, I am trying to do as much research before hand as possible. I realize that there is no one-size-fits-all method to parenting, and I am aware that even within the same family, different children have to be parented differently. With that being said, I think it's wise to have a quiver full of strategies that I can employ when needed. Here comes Pamela Druckerman's Bringing up Bebe. The Mrs. had read this last summer and told me how much I would enjoy it, so it had been on my radar for a while. Thanks to an amazon card, i finally decided to take the plunge and purchase this one - a rarity around here. The linked version has been expanded & updated to included Bebe Day by Day: 100 Keys to French Parenting, which can be purchased separately if you desire.
Druckerman is a US journalist who was eventually stationed outside of Paris, fell in love, and the rest is history. While pregnant with her first child, she began noticing how not unpleasant the children in France were in comparison to children "back home." Intrigued, she placed a notebook in her diaper bag and began taking notes everywhere & interviewing the mothers she encountered on what worked for them and what didn't.
There are some things that make French childcare very different from American childcare. Chiefly, there are numerous government-subsidized "day cares" of sorts called creches, in which mothers begin petitioning for placement as early as 3 months into their pregnancies. Children then go to free government preschools until they are school age. The caregivers at these schools are revered, trained well (only 30 of 500 who take the initial test to be admitted into the program are accepted for the year-long certification process), and excellent at what they do. The focus during these early years is not academics - children will learn to read in elementary school - but basic socialization, manners, and general life skills. For the French, earlier is not always better. They are perfectly fine with a 5-year-old not reading as long as he or she understands the basic cadre (framework) of the home and is generally polite to adults (hello, goodbye, looking in the eye, etc.). Another startling difference is the maternity leave available - 3 months PAID. We all know, especially in this election cycle, how behind the US is in terms of family leave at a birth, but this gap was startling.
In terms of core values, the French value independent children who are self-sufficient at an early age as opposed to the smother mothers, helicopter parents, and newly-dubbed lawnmower parents we often see in America today. The author cites her amazement when, one morning while she is ill, her 6-year-old happily and without direction prepares breakfast for the family, "but you have to do the coffee." French parents realize that one day, their precious ones will leave the nest and will need to be able to survive without them; they are merely starting the prep work early. They also believe that it is good for children to learn patience and how to occupy themselves when bored. They shouldn't always get what they want when they want (parents abide by a few firm "no" responses with freedom given in the small details) nor should they be constantly engaged. They believe that a little boredom teaches self-sufficiency and ultimately perseverance.
Another startling difference is how early French children "do their nights," meaning sleep through the night. Parents believe that it can be harmful to go in and rescue a child who is sleeping every time he or she whimpers in the night, so they recommend observing the child and knowing the specific cries (namely, the one meaning, "Oops I crapped my pants!") so you can respond accordingly. Like adults, babies sleep in cycles, and they sometimes stir in between those cycles; if parents run in to rescue them each time they stir, they will never learn to connect those on their own. The French also argue that it's ok for a baby to be hungry at night, as adults often wake up hungry in the night before returning to sleep. They believe that babies should eat, like adults, at meal time primarily with no snacking in between. Pediatricians will recommend the "cry it out" method if a baby still isn't "doing his nights" by four months old.
The French believe firmly in the idea of "adult time" at night. Their children are expected to go to bed or away from the family room so parents can enjoy each other alone. They also make sure that their dens are distinctly separate from the play room; this isn't an area for toys to lie in wait. The demarcation they create allows the child to make the distinction between adult time and parent time. Essentially, it is a life of balance - parent, spouse, employee. Most studies and reports indicate that French adults are more stable, more secure, and more confident than their American counterparts.
Say what you will about the French and their stuck-up reputations. They have several things figured out in the realm of parenting. If our mission as parents is creating independent humans, I think we can learn a lot from the French ideal.
Showing posts with label reviews. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reviews. Show all posts
Thursday, March 31, 2016
Saturday, March 26, 2016
top twenty
Y'all, adulating it so.very.tough. If I were to go back and tell fat baby Derek anything, it would be, "Slow down! Enjoy all this!" There are just so many responsibilities, places to be, things to do. Throw in a marriage, a semblance of having adult-y relationships, and trying to keep your own bucket full - or at least not bone-dry - and there are some things that get neglected. Namely, blogging. I've read - and listened - a lot this year. 20 so far in 2016, which is far beyond what I expected. So rather than do 20 individual posts - because all 5 of you don't need that much reading material - I decided to do a ranking of what I've read with my thoughts on each. As always, I've linked each work to its Amazon listing. Be sure to check out #readdoopsread2016 for "play-by-play" updates into our reading for the year.
1. Run of His Life - Jeffrey Toobin. If you haven't been living under a rock, you know how much this season of American Crime Story has overtaken pop culture. If you pay attention to the opening credits, you'll see this book cited as the basis for this season. I remember being enthralled with this case as an 8-year-old, despite the fact that I didn't understand the implications of it all. Toobin, a Harvard Law grad who covered the case when it happened, does a phenomenal job of explaining the ins and outs of this landmark case. But it is not for the faint of heart. At 450 pages of tiny, single-spaced print, this one took me 3 weeks. Worth every second.
2. Reconstructing Amelia - Kimberly McCreight. I have a confession. I have a slight obsession with tales set in high-school. Maybe it's my profession, but there is something weirdly interesting about the intricacies of the social circles of that age. We find a tale of girl gangs, hatred, seeds of gossip being planted, and the ultimate price that the victims pay when the mean girls win. Woven with insight into the group, flashbacks, and sadly accurate dialogue, this one was heartbreakingly wonderful.
3. A Man Called Ove - Fredrik Backman. At the recommendation of one of my most trusted book nerds, I gave this one a whirl. I can't fully say how glad I am that I did. I laughed, I identified with sad Ove, and I wept at the end. Ove is the man who we all fear we will become in some ways yet deeply admire for other reasons. My biggest complaint was the inconsistency of the language - I'm an admitted snob about what I call "beautiful prose" - but I have to remind myself this was translated form Swedish. If you have yet to read this, add it to your list today.
4. The Good Girl - Mary Kubica. While at first, I was billing this as Gone Girl: Lite, I eventually changed my tune. In a classic he said-she said back and forth, we are taken on a whirlwind of an abduction case. I will say, since the abducted is held in a cabin in the woods, that I don't recommend that you read it while in a cabin in a secluded town. Not that I know anyone who did that. Just a warning. An exceptionally written thriller with one heck of an epilogue.
5. After You - Jojo Moyes. A beautifully written sequel to Me Before You, so read that first if you want this to make sense. Moyes explores what it really feels like to move on after a tragedy while also investigating the way people get treated by others following the event. Also, this was not nearly as wrecking as its predecessor. I managed to not weep my eyes dry with this one.
6. Everything I Never Told You - Celeste Ng. When the middle child of an immigrant family goes missing and is eventually found dead, the effects of the trauma are far reaching. Ng expertly weaves a tale that shows how a tragedy can effect each family member differently. With flashbacks and chapters that focus on different family members throughout, she keeps the reader engaged.
7. Orphan #8 - Kim van Alkemade. When a young girl in 1920s New York is sent to a Hebrew home for orphans and is subjected to rounds of medical tests that alter her life permanently, she has a chance at redemption when she becomes a nurse. When the doctor who performed these experiments on her is suddenly her patient 30 years later, she has the ultimate decision to make in light of revenge or forgiveness. While I'm not typically into historical fiction or any work of fiction that isn't considered "modern" in my book, I really enjoyed the places that this book took the reader in location and in spirit.
8. More than Happy - Serena Miller. I'm a hippy at heart. Homemade, voodoo oils, crunchy granola, cloth diapering - these are my bread and butter. One of my great friends recommended this on the premise that my wife & I would get a lot out of it. While we are still waiting to be matched with our baby, I think it's never too soon to begin researching parenting strategies. The Amish have a lot of wisdom in the way they go about raising their children. They believe in the importance of a familial infrastructure, instilling respect and values from day one, and that less is more. I will purchase this book for my personal library. And that is a huge deal.
9. Sounds Like Me - Sara Bareilles. I love me some Sara B. I own all of her albums and have seen her live, a memory that I will always cherish because I remember how delightfully real she was on that stage. And she is supremely talented. Sara (whose last name always requires a google visit before typing) takes us on a journey of her life so far, backed by the lyrics of her songs and telling what they meant to her at the time. I heard her throughout and was left thankful for all she has done for music. (Side bar - if you follow one celebrity on twitter, it needs to be her.)
10. Before He Finds Her - Michael Kardos. Any time an audio reader tries accents from backwoods West Virginia, I chuckle. I chuckled profusely at times. The basic premise lies in a young girl who escaped 15 years ago when her father murdered her mother. He was never found, and she entered "witness protection" with her aunt and uncle, her only living relatives. While living in constant fear that he will find her, she could never attend school, have her photo taken, or have much contact with the outside world. When she learns she is pregnant, she wants to find her father so she can make peace with her past. What she finds in the process makes her question everything she has ever believed as truth. While it was billed as a thriller, I wouldn't go that far. Maybe "kiddie coaster" would suffice.
11. The Inner Circle - Brad Meltzer. The wife & I discovered the 3rd book in this trilogy at the end of last year and read it on a road trip. It was excellent, so we picked up with the beginning. It's essentially a fictional take on what I think is a not-so-fictional secret society that controls the presidency. Meltzer is a gifted story-teller, and he knows his history; it is evident here.
12. The Fifth Assassin - Brad Metlzer. See above.
13. The Cuckoo's Calling - Robert Galbraith. JK. It's JK Rowling. Cormoran Strike is the British Alex Cross minus the good looks. An overweight amputee injured in Afghanistan, he is now a private investigator. In the initial book of the series, he is investigating the alleged suicide of a supermodel, affectionately known as Cuckoo. Personally, I don't think the series would be as successful were Jo's name not attached to it. It's decent as a crime novel type series, but I am not obsessed with it in the way I am with Potter. Also, Jo has a potty mouth we never knew existed.
14. Where We Belong - Hoda Kotb. I.heart.Hodawoman. Here, she tells the tales of various people - some famous, others not so much - who overcame obstacles to end up - you guessed it - where they belong. I listened to this one, which she read, so I enjoyed hearing her. It was not particularly thrilling or enlightening though.
15. The Position - Meg Wolitzer. Meg's The Interestings will forever be one of my top novels of all time, and I love the narratives she weaves. But this was kooky. The basic premise is that a progressive couple in the 70s writes a kamasutra of sorts and invents a new "position." When their children discover the book - which has illustrations of the couple - and read it, the impact is far-reaching for all of them and effects each of them differently. If you're even remotely a prude, steer clear of this one.
16. Killing Reagan - Bill O'Reilly. I love the Killing series. I love the research and insight that Bill brings to various assassinations in our history. But this one just fell flat for me. All I learned was that Ronald was a player in her early days and his kids were kinda nuts. Nancy is still a class act.
17. The Innocent Killer - Michael Griesbach. If you followed Making a Murderer on Netflix (I didn't, but I did catch the Dateline special), then you will appreciate this book written by one of the lead prosecutors in the case. The first half of the book focused on the wrongful rape conviction handed down to Stephen Avery, and Griesbach was outraged at the injustice in that case. In all honesty, I was too. In the latter portion of the book, he dives into the murder case around which the documentary centered. The evidence he presents in the book - and from what I've been told, he was one of the corrupt ones - points straight to Avery unfortunately. This was a quick read, but it was not fantastic. However, it was heartbreaking that our justice system is not in fact just.
18. How I Shed my Skin - Jim Grimsley. As an adoptive dad open to transracial adoption, I was hopeful that this would be a useful read. The author grew up in the racist south and learned to overcome the lessons that were ingrained in him from an early age. What I hoped I would get was an honest approach to the race issue that I could share with others in the future. What I got was a memoir about a man whose story I was not entirely excited to learn.
19. The Martian - Andy Weir. I wanted this one to be good. I read the hype. I listened to everyone talk it up. But it just did not deliver for me. I enjoyed the math bits, but the science talk was just too much. I wanted character growth, and I ultimately got depressed. Although the audiobook reader was fabulous at the NASA engineer's voice. And geez, the language was over the top.
20. The Children's Crusade - Ann Packer. I have a confession. I judge books by their covers. And I am a cover art snob. If it's pretty, I'm intrigued; if it's ugly, I don't even consider it. This cover art drew me in in some strange way. The book follows couple and their coming-of-age teenagers in San Francisco. I am obsessed with coming of age for some weird reason - maybe because I was a bit of a late bloomer myself? The book focused mainly on the effect of divorce on the couple's now-adult children. I spent a week listening to this, and frankly, I am angry that I can't have that week back. While discussing this one with a friend who had also read it, she said she desired more character growth as they were all very static. Few things are as unfortunate as a static person who isn't real.
I wish I could say this is the last time that I won't blog each book, but let's face it y'all, life is busy. Hope you'll still come back when I've blogged again.
1. Run of His Life - Jeffrey Toobin. If you haven't been living under a rock, you know how much this season of American Crime Story has overtaken pop culture. If you pay attention to the opening credits, you'll see this book cited as the basis for this season. I remember being enthralled with this case as an 8-year-old, despite the fact that I didn't understand the implications of it all. Toobin, a Harvard Law grad who covered the case when it happened, does a phenomenal job of explaining the ins and outs of this landmark case. But it is not for the faint of heart. At 450 pages of tiny, single-spaced print, this one took me 3 weeks. Worth every second.
2. Reconstructing Amelia - Kimberly McCreight. I have a confession. I have a slight obsession with tales set in high-school. Maybe it's my profession, but there is something weirdly interesting about the intricacies of the social circles of that age. We find a tale of girl gangs, hatred, seeds of gossip being planted, and the ultimate price that the victims pay when the mean girls win. Woven with insight into the group, flashbacks, and sadly accurate dialogue, this one was heartbreakingly wonderful.
3. A Man Called Ove - Fredrik Backman. At the recommendation of one of my most trusted book nerds, I gave this one a whirl. I can't fully say how glad I am that I did. I laughed, I identified with sad Ove, and I wept at the end. Ove is the man who we all fear we will become in some ways yet deeply admire for other reasons. My biggest complaint was the inconsistency of the language - I'm an admitted snob about what I call "beautiful prose" - but I have to remind myself this was translated form Swedish. If you have yet to read this, add it to your list today.
4. The Good Girl - Mary Kubica. While at first, I was billing this as Gone Girl: Lite, I eventually changed my tune. In a classic he said-she said back and forth, we are taken on a whirlwind of an abduction case. I will say, since the abducted is held in a cabin in the woods, that I don't recommend that you read it while in a cabin in a secluded town. Not that I know anyone who did that. Just a warning. An exceptionally written thriller with one heck of an epilogue.
5. After You - Jojo Moyes. A beautifully written sequel to Me Before You, so read that first if you want this to make sense. Moyes explores what it really feels like to move on after a tragedy while also investigating the way people get treated by others following the event. Also, this was not nearly as wrecking as its predecessor. I managed to not weep my eyes dry with this one.
6. Everything I Never Told You - Celeste Ng. When the middle child of an immigrant family goes missing and is eventually found dead, the effects of the trauma are far reaching. Ng expertly weaves a tale that shows how a tragedy can effect each family member differently. With flashbacks and chapters that focus on different family members throughout, she keeps the reader engaged.
7. Orphan #8 - Kim van Alkemade. When a young girl in 1920s New York is sent to a Hebrew home for orphans and is subjected to rounds of medical tests that alter her life permanently, she has a chance at redemption when she becomes a nurse. When the doctor who performed these experiments on her is suddenly her patient 30 years later, she has the ultimate decision to make in light of revenge or forgiveness. While I'm not typically into historical fiction or any work of fiction that isn't considered "modern" in my book, I really enjoyed the places that this book took the reader in location and in spirit.
8. More than Happy - Serena Miller. I'm a hippy at heart. Homemade, voodoo oils, crunchy granola, cloth diapering - these are my bread and butter. One of my great friends recommended this on the premise that my wife & I would get a lot out of it. While we are still waiting to be matched with our baby, I think it's never too soon to begin researching parenting strategies. The Amish have a lot of wisdom in the way they go about raising their children. They believe in the importance of a familial infrastructure, instilling respect and values from day one, and that less is more. I will purchase this book for my personal library. And that is a huge deal.
9. Sounds Like Me - Sara Bareilles. I love me some Sara B. I own all of her albums and have seen her live, a memory that I will always cherish because I remember how delightfully real she was on that stage. And she is supremely talented. Sara (whose last name always requires a google visit before typing) takes us on a journey of her life so far, backed by the lyrics of her songs and telling what they meant to her at the time. I heard her throughout and was left thankful for all she has done for music. (Side bar - if you follow one celebrity on twitter, it needs to be her.)
10. Before He Finds Her - Michael Kardos. Any time an audio reader tries accents from backwoods West Virginia, I chuckle. I chuckled profusely at times. The basic premise lies in a young girl who escaped 15 years ago when her father murdered her mother. He was never found, and she entered "witness protection" with her aunt and uncle, her only living relatives. While living in constant fear that he will find her, she could never attend school, have her photo taken, or have much contact with the outside world. When she learns she is pregnant, she wants to find her father so she can make peace with her past. What she finds in the process makes her question everything she has ever believed as truth. While it was billed as a thriller, I wouldn't go that far. Maybe "kiddie coaster" would suffice.
11. The Inner Circle - Brad Meltzer. The wife & I discovered the 3rd book in this trilogy at the end of last year and read it on a road trip. It was excellent, so we picked up with the beginning. It's essentially a fictional take on what I think is a not-so-fictional secret society that controls the presidency. Meltzer is a gifted story-teller, and he knows his history; it is evident here.
12. The Fifth Assassin - Brad Metlzer. See above.
13. The Cuckoo's Calling - Robert Galbraith. JK. It's JK Rowling. Cormoran Strike is the British Alex Cross minus the good looks. An overweight amputee injured in Afghanistan, he is now a private investigator. In the initial book of the series, he is investigating the alleged suicide of a supermodel, affectionately known as Cuckoo. Personally, I don't think the series would be as successful were Jo's name not attached to it. It's decent as a crime novel type series, but I am not obsessed with it in the way I am with Potter. Also, Jo has a potty mouth we never knew existed.
14. Where We Belong - Hoda Kotb. I.heart.Hodawoman. Here, she tells the tales of various people - some famous, others not so much - who overcame obstacles to end up - you guessed it - where they belong. I listened to this one, which she read, so I enjoyed hearing her. It was not particularly thrilling or enlightening though.
15. The Position - Meg Wolitzer. Meg's The Interestings will forever be one of my top novels of all time, and I love the narratives she weaves. But this was kooky. The basic premise is that a progressive couple in the 70s writes a kamasutra of sorts and invents a new "position." When their children discover the book - which has illustrations of the couple - and read it, the impact is far-reaching for all of them and effects each of them differently. If you're even remotely a prude, steer clear of this one.
16. Killing Reagan - Bill O'Reilly. I love the Killing series. I love the research and insight that Bill brings to various assassinations in our history. But this one just fell flat for me. All I learned was that Ronald was a player in her early days and his kids were kinda nuts. Nancy is still a class act.
17. The Innocent Killer - Michael Griesbach. If you followed Making a Murderer on Netflix (I didn't, but I did catch the Dateline special), then you will appreciate this book written by one of the lead prosecutors in the case. The first half of the book focused on the wrongful rape conviction handed down to Stephen Avery, and Griesbach was outraged at the injustice in that case. In all honesty, I was too. In the latter portion of the book, he dives into the murder case around which the documentary centered. The evidence he presents in the book - and from what I've been told, he was one of the corrupt ones - points straight to Avery unfortunately. This was a quick read, but it was not fantastic. However, it was heartbreaking that our justice system is not in fact just.
18. How I Shed my Skin - Jim Grimsley. As an adoptive dad open to transracial adoption, I was hopeful that this would be a useful read. The author grew up in the racist south and learned to overcome the lessons that were ingrained in him from an early age. What I hoped I would get was an honest approach to the race issue that I could share with others in the future. What I got was a memoir about a man whose story I was not entirely excited to learn.
19. The Martian - Andy Weir. I wanted this one to be good. I read the hype. I listened to everyone talk it up. But it just did not deliver for me. I enjoyed the math bits, but the science talk was just too much. I wanted character growth, and I ultimately got depressed. Although the audiobook reader was fabulous at the NASA engineer's voice. And geez, the language was over the top.
20. The Children's Crusade - Ann Packer. I have a confession. I judge books by their covers. And I am a cover art snob. If it's pretty, I'm intrigued; if it's ugly, I don't even consider it. This cover art drew me in in some strange way. The book follows couple and their coming-of-age teenagers in San Francisco. I am obsessed with coming of age for some weird reason - maybe because I was a bit of a late bloomer myself? The book focused mainly on the effect of divorce on the couple's now-adult children. I spent a week listening to this, and frankly, I am angry that I can't have that week back. While discussing this one with a friend who had also read it, she said she desired more character growth as they were all very static. Few things are as unfortunate as a static person who isn't real.
I wish I could say this is the last time that I won't blog each book, but let's face it y'all, life is busy. Hope you'll still come back when I've blogged again.
Friday, January 1, 2016
top 5
Obviously, I love to read. Rebekah & I have enjoyed tracking all the books we have read the past couple of years through various hashtags. It's always interesting to go back at the end of the year and think through all the titles we've read and reminisce on what made some of this year's reads and listens truly extraordinary. Between the two of us, we amassed 90 titles this past calendar year - including 2 Potter, 3 LOTR, and many other long works, so that was quite an accomplishment considering all the other things we've experienced in 2015. Many people have asked us what our favorite recent books are (it has been said that people seek the Doops on advice for books, food, & fashion), so I decided to amass my list of the top 5 of 2015 plus a few more. If you're interested in viewing all the books we read, search out #doopsread2015 on instagram or facebook. Follow along in the new year with #readdoopsread2016!
My Top 5 are books I would read again at least once, maybe twice, and would probably watch a movie version if it were made. These are the books that I raved about and tell everyone to read. My Next 5 are those that I would read again and maybe see a movie. They were outstanding but not in the upper echelon of all that I read and heard. In a different year, they may have made the Top 5. My Bottom 5 are the books that I wished I hadn't even wasted my time on. They were either weird, sad, a waste of time, or a combination of some of them. Your opinions may differ from mine, but guess what? We can still be friends! #america (For your convenience, each title is linked to its Amazon listing.) It should also be noted that each list is fluid and should not be read as a 1 - 5 but rather a collection of excellence or crappiness. I have avoided synopses & reviews for the sake of brevity.
TOP 5
41: A Portrait of My Father, George W. Bush
The Girl on the Train, Paula Hawkins
Until You're Mine, Samantha Hayes
Orphan Train, Christina Baker Kline
The Admissions, Meg Mitchell Moore
NEXT 5
The President's Shadow, Brad Meltzer (side bar - literally just learned this is part of a series?)
The Rumor, Elin Hilderbrand
Philomena, Martin Sixsmith
The Girl in the Spider's Web, David Lagercrazntz
Go Set a Watchman, Harper Lee
BOTTOM 5
Reality Boy, A. S. King
My Sunshine Away, M. O. Walsh
The Rosie Effect, Graeme Simsion
Luckiest Girl Alive, Jessica Knoll
Alias Hook, Lisa Jensen
So let's hear it blogosphere! What books captivated you in 2015? Which books made you sad you wasted your time? Let's get this conversation moving!
My Top 5 are books I would read again at least once, maybe twice, and would probably watch a movie version if it were made. These are the books that I raved about and tell everyone to read. My Next 5 are those that I would read again and maybe see a movie. They were outstanding but not in the upper echelon of all that I read and heard. In a different year, they may have made the Top 5. My Bottom 5 are the books that I wished I hadn't even wasted my time on. They were either weird, sad, a waste of time, or a combination of some of them. Your opinions may differ from mine, but guess what? We can still be friends! #america (For your convenience, each title is linked to its Amazon listing.) It should also be noted that each list is fluid and should not be read as a 1 - 5 but rather a collection of excellence or crappiness. I have avoided synopses & reviews for the sake of brevity.
TOP 5
41: A Portrait of My Father, George W. Bush
The Girl on the Train, Paula Hawkins
Until You're Mine, Samantha Hayes
Orphan Train, Christina Baker Kline
The Admissions, Meg Mitchell Moore
NEXT 5
The President's Shadow, Brad Meltzer (side bar - literally just learned this is part of a series?)
The Rumor, Elin Hilderbrand
Philomena, Martin Sixsmith
The Girl in the Spider's Web, David Lagercrazntz
Go Set a Watchman, Harper Lee
BOTTOM 5
Reality Boy, A. S. King
My Sunshine Away, M. O. Walsh
The Rosie Effect, Graeme Simsion
Luckiest Girl Alive, Jessica Knoll
Alias Hook, Lisa Jensen
So let's hear it blogosphere! What books captivated you in 2015? Which books made you sad you wasted your time? Let's get this conversation moving!
Saturday, July 25, 2015
hootnanny
I love collections of humor essays because sometimes I just need a laugh. The wife has been away for a girls' beach weekend, so I need an extra laugh - especially after cutting lamination for 4.5 hours (not a dramatization). Celia Rivenbark is the master of guffaw-inducing material about life in the south. If you enjoy her work, you should enjoy my newest read. I'm always up for a new book of essays, so I was thrilled to see a new one on the featured shelf at the library. Hence how I stumbled upon People I want to Punch in the Throat. One of my great friends and former colleagues often speaks of punching people in the throat, so I was instantly intrigued. (Shoutout to my favorite MoWa DeLois!)
Jen Mann, author of a blog by the same title, presents a collection of short essays on everything from meeting her now-husband on AOL Chat and wearing overalls (shoutout to my beloved & Shalla who are trying to bring them back!) on their first "not a date" to the horror of a middle-aged woman asking for a dressing room at her garage sale so she could try on some $1 brassieres. The main people she seems to want to punch are the moms at her children's school - the ones who want her to employ "systems" for organization, create the most original crafts, and are disappointed in the lack of healthy offerings at the school carnival. In short, she would want to punch me in the throat. I laughed a good bit and finished it rather quickly, but I don't think Jen & I would be good friends.
3 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Jen Mann, author of a blog by the same title, presents a collection of short essays on everything from meeting her now-husband on AOL Chat and wearing overalls (shoutout to my beloved & Shalla who are trying to bring them back!) on their first "not a date" to the horror of a middle-aged woman asking for a dressing room at her garage sale so she could try on some $1 brassieres. The main people she seems to want to punch are the moms at her children's school - the ones who want her to employ "systems" for organization, create the most original crafts, and are disappointed in the lack of healthy offerings at the school carnival. In short, she would want to punch me in the throat. I laughed a good bit and finished it rather quickly, but I don't think Jen & I would be good friends.
3 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Friday, July 24, 2015
swan song
You probably know by now that Gone Girl is my all-time favorite novel, followed by the classic To Kill a Mockingbird. For years and years and years TKAM held the post, and I never thought I would change that; my reasons for replacing it are not for this post. I remember the magic of reading TKAM as a high-school junior, finding the movie marvelous, and rediscovering the book in college. Harper Lee managed to capture all the things we love and love to hate about growing up in the south and does so in a marvelous manner. If you're at all familiar with the scandal behind it, you know that since it was her only novel for so long and because she was friends with Truman Capote, there are rumors that she did not, in fact, write TKAM herself. I am not one of those people. I grew up less than 100 miles from her hometown and residence, so there was always an added appeal to the book growing up in the #251. Rebekah and I recently discussed my extreme love for all things Harper Lee (which may or may not be the inspiration of one of the #babydoop names on our list, but I digress), and she brought up that it was not as hallowed in her hometown near B'ham. I realized that this work is revered back home not only for its quality but also for the mystery and mystique behind Lee. Growing up in the stomping grounds of the book made it that much more real to us.
Unless you've been living under a rock, you know by now that Lee recently released Go Set a Watchman, which some saw as a follow-up to the sacred TKAM. Ms. Lee is currently in an assisted-living facility and her lawyer appears to be the driving force behind its release, so plenty of people were crying foul. As it turns out, GSAW was Lee's first draft and looked at Jean Louise Finch, who we all knew as Scout, as a 26-year-old returning to Maycomb, Alabama, from New York for her annual trip home. Her editors thought she could do better and wanted more insight into the childhood of JLF, so TKAM is what we got. And it is lovely - Scout is pretentious and stubborn, Atticus is the noble father she adores, and her town is full of crazy people. Her mastery of Southern culture and language is evident throughout, and I'm not here to blog about that because there's not much more I can add to the discussion. Before attacking GSAW I read TKAM again to get a fresher take on the collected work.
There are plenty of people who have expressed opinions that GSAW does not portray the characters in the same light, that the language isn't the same, or that it just isn't as rich as TKAM. I am not one of those people. Please understand that I'm very much of the opinion that you determine your opinion about things, and that if you are expecting to hate something you very likely will. I was determined to not be one of those people. I began looking at TKAM through a new lens for the purpose of supporting what I thought I would find in GSAW. I'm not going to give any plot points away, because I know a lot of you (my beloved included) don't want it spoiled but want a review of what I experienced. I will attempt to address the main "strikes" as I see them based on what I've read from others & their experiences. (Sorry not sorry for the longest introduction in history of blogging.)
I have to agree that the language in GSAW isn't as rich as it is in TKAM, but who's first draft ever is? I have a BS degree for a reason, and I was the master of flowery language when necessary. The descriptions in GSAW are admittedly not as vivid as they are in TKAM, but they are adequate. Think about your favorite recording artist. Does their first album sound as good as their latest project? If they are doing their job right, they got better with time. So. Did. Harper, y'all. We have to almost flip a switch in our brains because what we know as her second work takes place first chronologically. There are a few paragraphs that appear verbatim in both works (which, yes, could've been plagiarized / ghost written, but it wasn't enough to make me think that was the case). It was a bit troublesome that the narrative was inconsistently first-person only in bouts; in all honesty, I wanted JLF's view throughout the entire work.
The biggest complaint I have read from others who have read both is that they simply don't hear the characters' voices in the same way. I beg to differ. Jean Louise is still bull-headed as ever. If you don't think so, I refer you to the entirety of chapter 17 in GSAW. Scout was a vocal 7-year-old, one who wasn't afraid to march up to Mr. Cunningham/Coningham in the town square and talk about his son eating at her house one day while he had every intention of causing trouble for Atticus. Jean Louise is equally vocal, "in no sense of the word an easy person," and not at all afraid to give Atticus a piece of her mind when he has disappointed her. Aunt Alexandra is consistently portrayed as a tireless prude who is only concerned with her stupid corsets and how "the family" looks in the eyes of the community. News flash, Zandra, no. one. cares. There was a heavier dose of her influence in GSAW for reasons that you will find apparent when (not if) you read it.
Cal & Atticus have been the two biggest problems for many readers, mainly because the viewpoints are drastically different across the two works. There are flashback scenes in GSAW in which Cal is shown through a caring, loving lens, but if you've read it, you know there is that one scene that causes the reader to wonder what happened to skew the relationship. I have to admit that I wondered as well, but I remember that Cal was out of her element in working for the Finches, and Scout even admitted that she lived a "separate existence outside our household." Atticus is probably the toughest character to dissect (insert every facebook article you saw about Atticus jumping off the popular name list in Alabama...and a healthy eye roll from yours truly). I will admit that he is portrayed as a bit of a bigot in GSAW, a role that no one would've ever guessed after TKAM and his constant care of Helen Robinson and her family after Tom is shot (seriously, that can't be a spoiler for you at this point), not to mention the general way that he preached social consciousness to Scout & Jem. JLF is indignant about the new Atticus as she sees him, but thankfully, Uncle Jack points out that "men like me and my brother are obsolete and we've got to go, but it's a pity we'll carry with us the meaningful things of this society - there were some good things in it." Essentially he changed with the times because he HAD to. Jean Louise finds it more shocking because she's not around the goings-on of Maycomb, the racial tension of the civil rights movement, and her father's practice on a daily basis anymore. Even if she doesn't agree with his stance, perhaps she understood why it had to happen. And for those who say that she was so enamored with Atticus in TKAM, which made the viewpoint in GSAW more shocking, I have to argue that, while she did admire his stand for justice, there were times she merely tolerated him, referring to him as "satisfactory" in the opening pages in TKAM. I noted several instances throughout TKAM in which she seems downright disgruntled with him; she's not the daddy's girl we all made her out to be for the past 50 years. Also, consider your viewpoint on any individual who you revered during your childhood. Did your attitude toward that person ever change over a period of 20 years? We are all human, and our experiences shape us and the way we look at others; shouldn't the same be true for Scout and Atticus' relationship? Uncle Jack summed it up well near the end of GSAW: "Remember this also: it's always easy to look back and see what we were, yesterday, ten years ago. It is hard to see what we are."
On its own, Go Set a Watchman was a nice look at life in small town Alabama, even if it wasn't as deep as many readers would have liked. I walked away from it grateful that it was published, because in all honesty, who didn't wonder what happened to adult Scout? The differences in characterization I feel are mainly due to changing viewpoints at other parts of life. When considered with To Kill a Mockingbird (NOT as a sequel, but as an extension), we may finally have a complete take of childhood and early adulthood in the segregation-era south. The magic lives on.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Friday, July 17, 2015
nifty knockoff
Sometimes during the summer, you just need a book of fluff. You know the ones that make you think about nothing deep or moving, are usually somewhat-poorly written, but they are somehow oddly addicting. Recently I stumbled upon The Knockoff by Lucy Sykes & Jo Piazza, which was just that. Full disclosure: I'm quite certain I saw the cover while perusing B&N for new titles to add to my library hold list (#teacherbudget), and thought "Oooh, shiny! Let's give this one a try." Whoever coined the phrase that you can't judge a book by its cover never went book shopping with me; I am much more drawn to artsy or graphic covers and can usually determine if a book is worth my time simply by the jacket cover.
Much in the grain of The Devil Wears Prada (confession: Miranda Priestly is one of my spirit animals...ok ok, Meryl Streep is what does it for me), The Knockoff explores the not-so-nice side of the print fashion industry. We find Imogen, an "aging" (and by aging, I mean 40) editor-in-chief of a major fashion magazine in NYC who has recently returned to work from a six-month medical leave after a double mastectomy. She returns to find her former assistant - and recent Harvard B-school grad - Eve attempting to upend her and change the beloved magazine into an app which would allow readers to buy anything in the magazine with the tap of the screen (Hey GQ, how about making that a thing?), and Imogen is about as tech-savvy as your great aunt Martha. Eve attempts to rule the roost, despite holding a position beneath Imogen, and begins to run the office like a task master, forcing juice cleanses on those whom she deems too plump to sit on the front row of her wedding. Did I mention that her husband-to-be is Imogen's ex-boyfriend and nearly 25-years Eve's senior?
In the midst of this, Imogen is facing battles with her 10-year-old daughter Annabelle's self-confidence at home, most of which is caused by a mysterious commenter on her YouTube channel who is known only as Candy Cool (if you don't see this "twist" coming, we can't be literary friends). At the heart of the book, I believe there is an intended message of "mean girls never win" and "stay true to yourself, even when facing bullies," but it was difficult to get that underneath all of the candy-coated fashion industry names and what not. There were several prominent fashion icons whose identities were changed, likely for the sake of a copyright law or just a lawsuit in general, throughout the book, which for me, seemed like the book itself was a knockoff. Was this a fun read? Yes. Did I gain anything besides another entry in my summer reading log (because prizes)? Probably not.
2.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Much in the grain of The Devil Wears Prada (confession: Miranda Priestly is one of my spirit animals...ok ok, Meryl Streep is what does it for me), The Knockoff explores the not-so-nice side of the print fashion industry. We find Imogen, an "aging" (and by aging, I mean 40) editor-in-chief of a major fashion magazine in NYC who has recently returned to work from a six-month medical leave after a double mastectomy. She returns to find her former assistant - and recent Harvard B-school grad - Eve attempting to upend her and change the beloved magazine into an app which would allow readers to buy anything in the magazine with the tap of the screen (Hey GQ, how about making that a thing?), and Imogen is about as tech-savvy as your great aunt Martha. Eve attempts to rule the roost, despite holding a position beneath Imogen, and begins to run the office like a task master, forcing juice cleanses on those whom she deems too plump to sit on the front row of her wedding. Did I mention that her husband-to-be is Imogen's ex-boyfriend and nearly 25-years Eve's senior?
In the midst of this, Imogen is facing battles with her 10-year-old daughter Annabelle's self-confidence at home, most of which is caused by a mysterious commenter on her YouTube channel who is known only as Candy Cool (if you don't see this "twist" coming, we can't be literary friends). At the heart of the book, I believe there is an intended message of "mean girls never win" and "stay true to yourself, even when facing bullies," but it was difficult to get that underneath all of the candy-coated fashion industry names and what not. There were several prominent fashion icons whose identities were changed, likely for the sake of a copyright law or just a lawsuit in general, throughout the book, which for me, seemed like the book itself was a knockoff. Was this a fun read? Yes. Did I gain anything besides another entry in my summer reading log (because prizes)? Probably not.
2.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Tuesday, July 14, 2015
run the race
Ron Clark, of the Atlanta-based prep school baring his name, has long been education's "it" boy. He just seems to get the mission of education and gives 100% every day. If I had $800 to spare, I would attend his educator training in a heartbeat. He teaches with passion, creativity, and vigor, and he is a true inspiration; all of his books that I have read have been phenomenal. His newest read, Move Your Bus, offers some great advice for anyone looking to bring about change in an organization. While MYB is directed more at the business world, there are things that educators can take away from the book.
According to Clark, every business, school, non-profit organization, etc. contains people who fall into one of 5 categories: Drivers, Runners, Joggers, Walkers, and Riders. The Driver is the leader, the Runner is the go-getter who gives 100% all of the time, the Jogger moves quickly and does a good job (but not extraordinary work) regularly, the Walker may occasionally have one burst of goodness during the year, and the Rider is just showing up to work. I think we all know coworkers who fit into each category, and sometimes it can be frustrating to see the way the Driver handles them. The great part about this book is that Clark gives tips to the leaders of an organization (how to handle Riders, how much energy to focus on Runners, etc.) as well as the other people on the bus (how to run every day, how to handle those who aren't giving their best effort). He also makes you search deep into yourself and figure out what bus member you are. As much as I wish (as I hope all teachers do) I were a Runner, I don't think that's the reality of my situation. It turns out I'm a Jogger (the irony of my current running pace isn't lost on me either) - attentive to detail, prompt, well-planned and dressed, but not knock-your-socks off. My mission this school year is to be a Runner - be the best version of myself I can be every single day. Plan engaging activities, go beyond what's expected, and give the students in my classroom my best every day. Because if I'm not giving my kids my best, I have truly failed for the day. Regardless of your profession, there is something you can take away from this quick read.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book covers.
According to Clark, every business, school, non-profit organization, etc. contains people who fall into one of 5 categories: Drivers, Runners, Joggers, Walkers, and Riders. The Driver is the leader, the Runner is the go-getter who gives 100% all of the time, the Jogger moves quickly and does a good job (but not extraordinary work) regularly, the Walker may occasionally have one burst of goodness during the year, and the Rider is just showing up to work. I think we all know coworkers who fit into each category, and sometimes it can be frustrating to see the way the Driver handles them. The great part about this book is that Clark gives tips to the leaders of an organization (how to handle Riders, how much energy to focus on Runners, etc.) as well as the other people on the bus (how to run every day, how to handle those who aren't giving their best effort). He also makes you search deep into yourself and figure out what bus member you are. As much as I wish (as I hope all teachers do) I were a Runner, I don't think that's the reality of my situation. It turns out I'm a Jogger (the irony of my current running pace isn't lost on me either) - attentive to detail, prompt, well-planned and dressed, but not knock-your-socks off. My mission this school year is to be a Runner - be the best version of myself I can be every single day. Plan engaging activities, go beyond what's expected, and give the students in my classroom my best every day. Because if I'm not giving my kids my best, I have truly failed for the day. Regardless of your profession, there is something you can take away from this quick read.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book covers.
Thursday, July 9, 2015
rumor rundown
The blasted rumor mill. We've all been part of it at some point in our existence - either a victim or a customer. As much as we would like to stay away from it, it's out there. I'll never forget my worst experience with it. About four years ago, I had recently begun dating my now-wife, and we were heading out of town to her parents' house for a weekend of birthday celebrations and my meet and greet with the family - as in the first time I met any of them. Before we hit the road, Rebekah had a Dr. appointment, but not just any appointment - the lady doctor. Our plan was to hit the road right after the appointment, so I went with her and waited in the lobby. Low and behold, a parent (whose two younger children were former students of mine) at my school walks in with her oldest daughter for a pregnancy visit. You should also understand that I used to teach at a VERY conservative Christian school, the same one I attended for 13 years and basically knew everyone. So you can imagine (a) the awkwardness that ensued and (b) the flack I had to field when school began. Add to that the fact that we had just announced our engagement when school was starting back! Fun times, I tell you. I'm sure everyone reading this has a story about his or her worst experience with the rumor milll; I would love to hear them all, simply because the truth is usually so far from what everyone else hears these days that it's comical.
Y'all know that Elin Hilderbrand is one of my favorite authors right now. She has a knack for a (slightly-trashy) beach read that always offers real characters who are believable and relatable. I've read most of her work, and I'm rarely disappointed. Her newest release, The Rumor, was written while she was battling breast cancer, so I was really excited to tackle it - so excited, in fact that the day it was released I got on the waiting list at the library for it and was shocked and excited when my name came up just a couple weeks later. I dove in Monday night, didn't read much Tuesday because I was working on my new classroom decorations (I'll blog about it when I'm all moved in), and then had all but 70 pages read when I went to bed Wednesday night. I would've stayed up to finish it, but PawPaw doesn't stay up late very often (and by late, I mean 9:00). After my run this morning, I finished it within about an hour and a half. I simply couldn't put this one down.
Like all of Elin's reads, the entire book takes place on Nantucket Island, where she is actually a resident. Many of her major characters have recurring roles in minor ways in other books, including here. The central plot line of the book revolves around two married couples, Madeleine & Trevor King and Grace & Eddie Pancik, who are long-time best friends. They must grapple with how the public perception of things can shift the relationship dynamics simply because of "did ya hear?" I won't go into the details, because they are essentially the backbone of the book, but there are a lot of hurt feelings, scarred relationships, and of course a heavy dose of scandal. Will things be reconciled in the end? Will this finally be one of those "not happily ever after" reads? Elin often writes from an omniscient point-of-view that focuses on someone new each chapter, and in this one she even makes Nantucket itself one of those viewpoints, which is really what drives the rumor along. That viewpoint was strikingly different and beautiful. At the heart of the novel is a message of "can you believe everything that you hear?" and Elin manages to make the reader delve into his own experiences with this without being judgy or preachy. I loved this one from start to finish. Hilderbrand is the master of the summer novel.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
For real, I want your rumor experiences in the comments!
Y'all know that Elin Hilderbrand is one of my favorite authors right now. She has a knack for a (slightly-trashy) beach read that always offers real characters who are believable and relatable. I've read most of her work, and I'm rarely disappointed. Her newest release, The Rumor, was written while she was battling breast cancer, so I was really excited to tackle it - so excited, in fact that the day it was released I got on the waiting list at the library for it and was shocked and excited when my name came up just a couple weeks later. I dove in Monday night, didn't read much Tuesday because I was working on my new classroom decorations (I'll blog about it when I'm all moved in), and then had all but 70 pages read when I went to bed Wednesday night. I would've stayed up to finish it, but PawPaw doesn't stay up late very often (and by late, I mean 9:00). After my run this morning, I finished it within about an hour and a half. I simply couldn't put this one down.
Like all of Elin's reads, the entire book takes place on Nantucket Island, where she is actually a resident. Many of her major characters have recurring roles in minor ways in other books, including here. The central plot line of the book revolves around two married couples, Madeleine & Trevor King and Grace & Eddie Pancik, who are long-time best friends. They must grapple with how the public perception of things can shift the relationship dynamics simply because of "did ya hear?" I won't go into the details, because they are essentially the backbone of the book, but there are a lot of hurt feelings, scarred relationships, and of course a heavy dose of scandal. Will things be reconciled in the end? Will this finally be one of those "not happily ever after" reads? Elin often writes from an omniscient point-of-view that focuses on someone new each chapter, and in this one she even makes Nantucket itself one of those viewpoints, which is really what drives the rumor along. That viewpoint was strikingly different and beautiful. At the heart of the novel is a message of "can you believe everything that you hear?" and Elin manages to make the reader delve into his own experiences with this without being judgy or preachy. I loved this one from start to finish. Hilderbrand is the master of the summer novel.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
For real, I want your rumor experiences in the comments!
Saturday, July 4, 2015
life of a legend
Last September, the world lost a comedic legend in Joan Rivers. Say what you will about her, but no one could match her quick, cutting wit. She said what we were all thinking and never apologized for being who she was. I loved that despite the things she said in her act, she was never afraid to make fun of herself. I've listened to both of her recent books, Diary of a Mad Diva and I Hate Everyone...Starting with Me, read by the master herself - entreating in its own right. I was so pleased that Joan's daughter Melissa Rivers recently released a tribute to her late mother, The Book of Joan.
Through a series of hilarious essays, Melissa gives us an idea of what it was like to grow up with Joan as a mother - the ups, the downs, the in-betweens. Rivers writes with a touching honesty and humor not unlike what made her mother so famous. While I won't say it read like a biography, I can't entirely say it read like a memoir either. Imagine taking some of the most prominent memories of a dear family member and writing about them. That is exactly what Melissa did. I laughed, laughed, and laughed some more. Next thing I knew, I was turning the final page and reading about their last minutes together, and I was crying. This book was a very fast to read - less than a day of total reading time for me. Rivers tells a beautiful story of Joan, who is missed by so many. If you are a fan of Joan at all, you must read this.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Through a series of hilarious essays, Melissa gives us an idea of what it was like to grow up with Joan as a mother - the ups, the downs, the in-betweens. Rivers writes with a touching honesty and humor not unlike what made her mother so famous. While I won't say it read like a biography, I can't entirely say it read like a memoir either. Imagine taking some of the most prominent memories of a dear family member and writing about them. That is exactly what Melissa did. I laughed, laughed, and laughed some more. Next thing I knew, I was turning the final page and reading about their last minutes together, and I was crying. This book was a very fast to read - less than a day of total reading time for me. Rivers tells a beautiful story of Joan, who is missed by so many. If you are a fan of Joan at all, you must read this.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Thursday, July 2, 2015
flynn fraud
If you know my love of books, you know that Gillian Flynn's Gone Girl is my all-time favorite book. Hands down. It's twisted, brilliant, and snarky all at once. So when I hear a new book is the next GG and I see that the film rights have been picked up by Reese Witherspoon's production company, I'm on board. Jessica Knoll was being hailed as a new Gillian Flynn in her debut novel Luckiest Girl Alive. So to the library website I went to place a hold on the book and begin my wait. And wait. And wait. Seriously, I waited for over a month for this one, all the while hearing that it's just fantastic. You should also know that our county library system isn't the largest, and even the most popular books are often only purchased in trios. You should also know I'm not the most patient individual in the world, so when my email finally arrived, I dashed to the library elated to get my hands on it. I was a little sad that my librarian didn't strike up a conversation about it, but I wasn't too sad to take this amazing selfie with the book when I got in the car.
I finished up the book I was reading and skipped the others on my list to dive into this find.
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| Seriously, y'all. This is my life! |
LGA finds Ani FaNelli-soon-to-be-Harrison (formerly TifAni. Seriously what kind of name is that? Shame on you Mrs. FaNellli!) living what appears to be the dream life as an editor for a Cosmo-esque (sidebar: the author truly is an editor at Cosmo...just sayin') magazine in Manhattan, only weeks away from her dream wedding to a wealthy man who will make all of her dreams come true. All the while, Ani keeps alluding to "the event" from high school that haunted her in her freshman year at a prestigious prep-school on the other side of the tracks from her Philadelphia suburb home. We get snippets here and there through alternating chapters of present-day and 2001. It turns out, she wasn't the good girl everyone thought she was, and several young men took advantage of her after a night of hard partying. When we return to present-day, she keeps referencing a documentary that she and her then-cross country coach are going to be participating in about "the event," which in all honesty I thought was the rape. I won't give away what the event was, but it changed her life and the community's forever. She finds herself on the wrong end of things and no one trusts her - even her parents. Essentially, New York and her rich man were what she was looking for to erase the pain of the past; her new take on her dreadful name is just the first step in her escape from Philly.
Things happen during the documentary, and she is essentially allowed to make amends with her past and one of the main perpetrators against her. When she returns home just before her Nantucket wedding, some things have changed. I won't go into detail, but for me the entire last chapter ruined the book. The ending was total rubbish. Not a twist that I didn't see coming, but just a horrible ending to an otherwise decent tale. I loved the way that Ani told her story - first-person, heartbreakingly real, and full of deadpan wit. I can't count the number of times I read a paragraph aloud to my wife (check out her blog here) because the inner dialogue was just that funny. One of my favorite twisted lines was "I lost my virginity to someone who never saw my breasts." Such a weird yet poignant line. I love a female protagonist who is witty, authoritative, and cutting (use your own language here, but I won't say that word). You know the kind who can cut you the meanest dig in the book without your even realizing it; those are my kinds of heroines. Knoll delivered on that front. Her writing style was en pointe; I wish her plot had been as well.
2.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Saturday, June 27, 2015
positive parenting sans puppets
In case you've forgotten, my wife and I are in the home study process of our adoption. This will be our first child, and we are excited to be on this path. If you would like to follow our journey, visit our Facebook page here and share it with your friends and family. While I am excited, I often worry (there's a shocker for the day) about my own demons and insecurities manifesting themselves in our child. We have a wonderful counselor through Lifeline Children's Services, our local adoption agency, who recommended a parenting book to me recently in one of our sessions; she said, "You can't lead your child to a level of healing you haven't yet experienced yourself." You better believe I wrote that one down in my adoption journal (what, you don't have an adoption journal separate from your regular journal?). The quote was from Karyn Purvis' The Connected Child. The major premise of the book is bringing healing to adoptive children and bringing about healing for your family.
While the book, at times, read like a human growth and development textbook, Purvis and her team had several great strategies. Something she stressed was that adopted or fostered children often face several challenges before they even enter your home. Most of the time, these children have grown up quickly before you had the chance to meet them, and as a result, they face attachment difficulties. The best thing an adoptive parent can do for his child is to love him unconditionally. There are often things that will stop him from accepting that love initially, but Purvis encourages the reader not to give up. I really liked her idea of offering a choice in a clear, calm voice (often counting off the two options with one and two fingers in a non-threatening way) when your child is being difficult. For example, "You have two choices. You may walk beside the cart at the grocery store or you may ride in the buggy. Which do you choose?" If a child chooses to walk but then breaks the agreement, the parent is to remind the child of the choice and offer "If you don't stick to our agreement, I will choose for you." (i.e., You act afool and I will put your tail in this buggy and will even leave the buggy sitting in the store and take you home for your consequence which will be worse.) Purvis never advocates giving a free pass to a child simply because he is emotionally troubled and from an unstable background. Instead, she encourages parents to connect with their own feelings (yikes!), be firm and fair, and enforce the boundaries that have been set.
Overall I enjoyed this read. It has a lot of good strategies that would apply to any parent, not just an adoptive one. My wife and I discussed a lot of the elements in the book as I read, and we will be enforcing many of them in our house (though I'm not too sure about those puppet shows when #babydoop is afraid of the potty...puppets scare me). Several strategies presented are very akin to the Montessori method of learning, and that is something that is a high topic of discussion in our house since Rebekah teaches at a local Montessori school. If you are struggling with an emotionally detached child, are an adoptive parent, or are a family member or support system for someone who is adopting, I highly highly recommend this book.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
While the book, at times, read like a human growth and development textbook, Purvis and her team had several great strategies. Something she stressed was that adopted or fostered children often face several challenges before they even enter your home. Most of the time, these children have grown up quickly before you had the chance to meet them, and as a result, they face attachment difficulties. The best thing an adoptive parent can do for his child is to love him unconditionally. There are often things that will stop him from accepting that love initially, but Purvis encourages the reader not to give up. I really liked her idea of offering a choice in a clear, calm voice (often counting off the two options with one and two fingers in a non-threatening way) when your child is being difficult. For example, "You have two choices. You may walk beside the cart at the grocery store or you may ride in the buggy. Which do you choose?" If a child chooses to walk but then breaks the agreement, the parent is to remind the child of the choice and offer "If you don't stick to our agreement, I will choose for you." (i.e., You act afool and I will put your tail in this buggy and will even leave the buggy sitting in the store and take you home for your consequence which will be worse.) Purvis never advocates giving a free pass to a child simply because he is emotionally troubled and from an unstable background. Instead, she encourages parents to connect with their own feelings (yikes!), be firm and fair, and enforce the boundaries that have been set.
Overall I enjoyed this read. It has a lot of good strategies that would apply to any parent, not just an adoptive one. My wife and I discussed a lot of the elements in the book as I read, and we will be enforcing many of them in our house (though I'm not too sure about those puppet shows when #babydoop is afraid of the potty...puppets scare me). Several strategies presented are very akin to the Montessori method of learning, and that is something that is a high topic of discussion in our house since Rebekah teaches at a local Montessori school. If you are struggling with an emotionally detached child, are an adoptive parent, or are a family member or support system for someone who is adopting, I highly highly recommend this book.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Tuesday, June 23, 2015
end of excuses
So y'all know I love real-life and autobiographies. And y'all know I love to run. So a book about someone's running adventures is like pure gold! If there's a hint of adversity, it's even better. One such book I would recommend is Stronger by Jeff Bauman, a survivor of the Boston Marathon bombing. If you've read that and enjoyed it, you will love Grace to Race written by Sister Madonna Buder, a lady known as the Iron Nun.
While the first half of the book recounts her growing up and enjoying various activities (which admittedly doesn't move that quickly), the second half deals with her foray into the competitive world of running and triathlons. Madonna details her decision to join the Catholic faith, her family's reaction to choosing the life of a nun, and the emotional reactions she had throughout all of that. While serving as a nun, she is constantly shifted from one convent to another all over the country - from Washington to Florida and everywhere in between. While attending a conference at the age of 48, she randomly decides to go for a jog on the beach and discovers she loves the sport. Over time she expands her distance and begins running marathons regularly, even qualifying for Boston (insert jealousy here). As marathoning loses its lore, she eventually tries her hand at triathlons, which is a whole new beast, but it is where she truly begins to flourish. With painful honesty, Buder recalls the various injuries she sustains, many of which required surgery, while training and racing. In spite of it all, she somehow manages to set record after record. She opens new age categories in multiple Ironman triathlons (2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike, 26.2 mile run) and sets long-standing records in them. Sister Madonna is nothing short of a pioneer who truly makes you wonder what your excuse is. If she, in spite of her injuries and setbacks, can do all this, why can't I conquer my fears? This was a good, quick read that was enjoyable most of the way.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
While the first half of the book recounts her growing up and enjoying various activities (which admittedly doesn't move that quickly), the second half deals with her foray into the competitive world of running and triathlons. Madonna details her decision to join the Catholic faith, her family's reaction to choosing the life of a nun, and the emotional reactions she had throughout all of that. While serving as a nun, she is constantly shifted from one convent to another all over the country - from Washington to Florida and everywhere in between. While attending a conference at the age of 48, she randomly decides to go for a jog on the beach and discovers she loves the sport. Over time she expands her distance and begins running marathons regularly, even qualifying for Boston (insert jealousy here). As marathoning loses its lore, she eventually tries her hand at triathlons, which is a whole new beast, but it is where she truly begins to flourish. With painful honesty, Buder recalls the various injuries she sustains, many of which required surgery, while training and racing. In spite of it all, she somehow manages to set record after record. She opens new age categories in multiple Ironman triathlons (2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike, 26.2 mile run) and sets long-standing records in them. Sister Madonna is nothing short of a pioneer who truly makes you wonder what your excuse is. If she, in spite of her injuries and setbacks, can do all this, why can't I conquer my fears? This was a good, quick read that was enjoyable most of the way.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Sunday, June 21, 2015
pill poppin' palooza
Despite the fact that I brought 4 books with me on my trip to Mobile, I wound up with nothing to read on my last day there thanks to 2 books that were less than stellar. Thankfully, my mom is more obsessed with books than I am. Her kitchen has 2 sets of floor-to-ceiling bookshelves that are double stacked and running out of room. A second bedroom has the same setup with children's books. As a math nerd, people always ask why I love English, reading, and writing; I get it honestly is all I can really say. We were always doing summer reading at the library and constantly had books growing up. I said all that to say, I went pursuing through the mom-brary and stumbled upon All Fall Down from Jennifer Weiner. Side note: If I were a famous author and went by a pseudonym as so many do, I sure wouldn't choose anything that could make middle school boys (and their former teachers) giggle when they saw it. Just keeping it real, y'all! Weiner reminds me a lot of Emily Giffin. If you like her work, you will probably like this one.
Weiner weaves a tale of suburban mom Allison Weiss who has become addicted to prescription painkillers and her subsequent fall from grace. This story is especially relevant for our time; I just read here that Xanax is now the #2 cause of DUI in the state of Alabama. If there were ever a "time" for a book like this, it is now. Allison finds herself unhappy with where her life is: her weight, her overly-sensitive / might need medication at age 7 daughter, her husband who is slipping away and eventually finds a work wife, her father's progression toward Alzheimer's. She is simply at a place where she can no longer "handle" all that life throws her way. Conveniently, she threw her back out several years before and has a Percocet prescription. But soon, that's not enough; it takes more than one for her to survive the day. Then it's Vicodin; next it's OxyContin. She has several doctors on speed dial who will call in prescriptions for her at a moment's notice. She even begins shopping the black market online to get her fix.
While her blogging career takes off, her personal life continues to spin out of control. She is eventually caught by a teacher at her daughter's school when she shows up to carpool stoned. Her husband then tries to intervene and she tries to take herself off the pills - bad decision. She goes into full withdrawal mode and tries to get more pills from a doc-in-a-box, which lands her in the hospital and eventually a rehab facility where she is miserable. She even breaks out for her daughter's birthday party. She returns and finds / realizes for herself that she actually needs more time in rehab than her original 28 days. Suddenly we find Allison back at home with her daughter, out of rehab and learning to adjust to life as a recovering addict - no tales of the 60 days she spent in rehab. All is suddenly right in the world, or so it appears.
I loved the fact that Allison spoke her mind freely in the book and that the book was written first-person. I love that she was occasionally vulnerable in spite of her addiction-ladeled craziness. I didn't love the way we jumped directly from returning to rehab to out of it. Seriously, I wanted some "scoop" on what she really endured when she committed to her own healing. I also didn't love the way the book bogged down in the middle and lost my attention. It started strong and kept me entertained at first, but then I found myself just wanting it to end. I'm a fairly quick reader, but this one took me over a week (granted, we nested and cleaned out the future nursery and organized all the things, plus I had a day-long workshop), and that was just not cool with me. It was decent but it is not a book i will put on my list of things I have to tell people to read.
2.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Sunday, June 14, 2015
lad lit
I love love love a good beach read. You know the type - raunchy, completely lacking in depth, but easy to read in a day or so. They're my go-to summer read. Usually I follow in the lane of anything by Elin Hilderbrand, but sometimes I tire of reading about a femme fatale who has either (a) just gotten terribly terminal news, (b) found out her husband / boyfriend / significant other is really a tramp, or (c) just wants to go to the island to "find herself." Don't get me wrong, I love Elin and read most of her work (new book from her this Tuesday, y'all!), but I tire of the estrogen overdose. Sometimes, we men need a lighthearted read about relationships that will make us laugh, that will be a quick read, and that will ultimately leave us appreciative of the relationship we have. Gentlemen, we are in luck! No longer are we constrained to "chick lit" for our beach reads. Allow me to introduce what I would like to call "lad lit" (let's make that a thing!).
For my return from #251, I had lined up Christopher Noxon's debut novel Plus One, a random audiobook I stumbled upon while perusing the library. After a disappointing listen on the trip down, I was glad to have this one for a pick-me-up. The book centers around Alex Sherman-Zicklin (yep, he took his wife's name) and his life as his television writer wife's "plus one" at red carpet events. When Figgy (nope, not making that up) wins her first Emmy (on her 14th series attempt), she becomes the talk of Hollywood and Alex begins to struggle with his new role as the secondary bread winner at home. When Figgy gets an insane pay raise, Alex decides to become a stay-at-home dad for precocious 7-year-old Silvia and cosmetic-making fourth-grade Scott (this book truly has every element of the modern family). Alex also begins hobnobbing with other plus ones and discovers artisanal butchers, Vietnamese day spas, man-scaping, and the ever-terrifying snip-snip down below (just wait for the plot twist on that one!). In the meantime, the butcher's assistant tries to start a fling with Alex only to advance her own career by getting in with Figgy, leaving him really struggling with his identity and worth as a man. I won't spoil the plot for you, but it may not necessarily end as you think.
Overall, Noxon does a great job of capturing the male perspective on relationship. So many times, light-hearted reads that delve into the deeper aspects of what makes marriage work are centered on the wife's perspective, and this was refreshing. He used zingers when necessary, kept the plot moving forward with excellent prose, and kept the reader interested at all times. It's nice to find a book geared toward men (at least in my head, that's the target audience here; who really knows?) that isn't all war, guns, and spies - not that I don't like those things. Again, this was a breath of fresh air and something different. I would read more of Noxon's work.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
For my return from #251, I had lined up Christopher Noxon's debut novel Plus One, a random audiobook I stumbled upon while perusing the library. After a disappointing listen on the trip down, I was glad to have this one for a pick-me-up. The book centers around Alex Sherman-Zicklin (yep, he took his wife's name) and his life as his television writer wife's "plus one" at red carpet events. When Figgy (nope, not making that up) wins her first Emmy (on her 14th series attempt), she becomes the talk of Hollywood and Alex begins to struggle with his new role as the secondary bread winner at home. When Figgy gets an insane pay raise, Alex decides to become a stay-at-home dad for precocious 7-year-old Silvia and cosmetic-making fourth-grade Scott (this book truly has every element of the modern family). Alex also begins hobnobbing with other plus ones and discovers artisanal butchers, Vietnamese day spas, man-scaping, and the ever-terrifying snip-snip down below (just wait for the plot twist on that one!). In the meantime, the butcher's assistant tries to start a fling with Alex only to advance her own career by getting in with Figgy, leaving him really struggling with his identity and worth as a man. I won't spoil the plot for you, but it may not necessarily end as you think.
Overall, Noxon does a great job of capturing the male perspective on relationship. So many times, light-hearted reads that delve into the deeper aspects of what makes marriage work are centered on the wife's perspective, and this was refreshing. He used zingers when necessary, kept the plot moving forward with excellent prose, and kept the reader interested at all times. It's nice to find a book geared toward men (at least in my head, that's the target audience here; who really knows?) that isn't all war, guns, and spies - not that I don't like those things. Again, this was a breath of fresh air and something different. I would read more of Noxon's work.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Saturday, June 13, 2015
nostalgic nothingness
Coming-of-age novels are one of my all-time favorites. It takes me back to the awkward days of middle school when my biggest concern was whether or not I put my name on my algebra homework. I recently found a review of M.O. Walsh's My Sunshine Away, which was touted as a coming-of-age novel set in the late 80s chock full of nostalgic references. While I came-of-age in the 90s, I absolutely love the 80s. Plus this was set in the South, so I was thrilled. The gist of the plot is that the main character (whose name I have already forgotten, I kid you not) recounts the years of his adolescence in which he is accused of raping the neighbor girl on whom he had an obsession-level crush and concludes with his turn as a father in his late 20s.
I just traveled to my hometown for a quick visit with my friends and family, and I had my iPod loaded with the audiobook; I thought I was set. Boy was I wrong. I appreciate nostalgia, first-person accounts, and adolescence. What I don't appreciate is a narrative that drags and drags and drags on. The majority of the 9-hour listen could have been eliminated. While recounting a memory, the narrator goes on a tangent about what it was like when New Orleans residents who were displaced by Katrina began infiltrating his beloved Baton Rouge. Seriously, how did that move the plot forward? There was even a point in the book where I was constructing a haiku in my head while I drove, because I was that bored. But I had to finish, because I am not a quitter! All in all, don't waste your time.
1.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
I just traveled to my hometown for a quick visit with my friends and family, and I had my iPod loaded with the audiobook; I thought I was set. Boy was I wrong. I appreciate nostalgia, first-person accounts, and adolescence. What I don't appreciate is a narrative that drags and drags and drags on. The majority of the 9-hour listen could have been eliminated. While recounting a memory, the narrator goes on a tangent about what it was like when New Orleans residents who were displaced by Katrina began infiltrating his beloved Baton Rouge. Seriously, how did that move the plot forward? There was even a point in the book where I was constructing a haiku in my head while I drove, because I was that bored. But I had to finish, because I am not a quitter! All in all, don't waste your time.
1.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
brain biology
One of the positive side effects of OCD is planning ahead for just about every single situation. So you shouldn't be surprised to learn that I've already started reading parenting books. I mean, it's never too soon to get some strategies and ideas. Our adoption counselor recommended Daniel Siegel & Tina Bryson's The Whole Brain Child as a resource for our preparations, and I was on board from the start. It met my needs for nerdiness and preparing to be the best parent I can be for our #babydoop.
Their work focuses on the science behind our brains and how to integrate the parts of the brain (left and right, upstairs and downstairs, etc) into a cohesive whole. While you might think this would read like a biology textbook, it doesn't at all. I was able to read it in a day and half that were interspersed with driving and visiting with family and friends in my hometown, so it's not excruciating at all. Siegel ad Bryson write in easy-to-read language and present 12 easy strategies for you to use with your child to encourage a healthy brain and healthier child, teen, or young adult. One of the best aspects of this book is that it has scripted conversation starters you can use with your child to use the strategies, broken down by age category. There is even an accompanying workbook with worksheets and exercises that you can find here. I highly recommend this if you're struggling with how to handle the arguing, the emotional outbursts, the general weariness of parenthood; I guarantee you will find something you can apply to your life with your child this week. It is a book that I have already planned on purchasing for the #babydoop library.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Their work focuses on the science behind our brains and how to integrate the parts of the brain (left and right, upstairs and downstairs, etc) into a cohesive whole. While you might think this would read like a biology textbook, it doesn't at all. I was able to read it in a day and half that were interspersed with driving and visiting with family and friends in my hometown, so it's not excruciating at all. Siegel ad Bryson write in easy-to-read language and present 12 easy strategies for you to use with your child to encourage a healthy brain and healthier child, teen, or young adult. One of the best aspects of this book is that it has scripted conversation starters you can use with your child to use the strategies, broken down by age category. There is even an accompanying workbook with worksheets and exercises that you can find here. I highly recommend this if you're struggling with how to handle the arguing, the emotional outbursts, the general weariness of parenthood; I guarantee you will find something you can apply to your life with your child this week. It is a book that I have already planned on purchasing for the #babydoop library.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
why i teach
I have always loved school. Like love loved. The appearance of school supplies each July fills my little chubby heart with infinite glee. Even as an elementary student, I was fascinated by composition notebooks, freshly-sharpened pencils, and three-prong folders (but let's be honest - those prongs were a total joke, and don't ask me to take out a sheet from the front of that folder unless you'd like me to take said sheet and give you a big ole paper cut on the face). It was no wonder that I chose education as a career. When I run into former teachers with whom I haven't kept in touch, the most common response is "I'm not surprised" when they learn of my career choice. I was and still am fascinated by learning, academia, and the brain. But oh, there's so much more than that. There's the way that struggling student lights up with glee when he finally gets it. There's the sound of appreciation in a parent's voice when you call to brag on her daughter. There's the hugs (ok, not really those because math boy doesn't like that), the laughs at the end of a crazy hard lesson when a student makes an off the cuff remark, the sincere thankfulness that a student whispers on the way out because he knows you really do believe in him. These are the things that keep me afloat when I want to throw in the towel, especially near spring break and exam time.
I love reading books about teachers in the trenches. Some of you may remember Tony Danza's foray into teaching a few years ago for a short-lived A&E series about what it really takes to be a teacher. Danza chronicled his adventures in I'd Like to Apologize to Every Teacher I Ever Had; I'll spare you the subtitle, but it's just as long. Danza does what many "from the field" books fail to do, in that he was completely and utterly honest about how overwhelmed he was every day of the year. Granted, he taught only one class of students for the duration of the year, so I kind of chuckled when I thought about what he would really feel like if he had, oh I don't know 200 students in one school year. Tony (I couldn't help but read it in his voice and expect to read "Moh-nah" at some point!) shares his triumphs: successful projects, the first time he connects with a student in particular; his stumbles: the fights that broke out in his classroom, the time the principal walked in on an unplanned movie; and his struggles: balancing all it takes to teach plus having a family, feeling pulled in every possible direction. With his trademark honesty, Danza paints a beautiful picture of the struggle every public school teacher faces day in and day out while also expressing his sincere appreciation for what we do.
If you are a teacher, you will be reminded why you are in the profession when you read this. If you aren't a teacher, maybe you will be inspired to thank one. We get a lot of bad press these days - testing cover-ups, summer breaks, snow days, promiscuous relationships with students - but please remember that there are a lot of good teachers out there who aren't any of those things. My profession is full of hard-working men and women who get to work early, leave late, wear countless hats for their students, and are truly passionate about their job - not the cash. So why do I teach? Because someone believed in me many years ago and showed me I could change a few lives. I may not be able to change the whole world, but if I can change the way one young person thinks about himself or about math, then it is all worth it.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
I love reading books about teachers in the trenches. Some of you may remember Tony Danza's foray into teaching a few years ago for a short-lived A&E series about what it really takes to be a teacher. Danza chronicled his adventures in I'd Like to Apologize to Every Teacher I Ever Had; I'll spare you the subtitle, but it's just as long. Danza does what many "from the field" books fail to do, in that he was completely and utterly honest about how overwhelmed he was every day of the year. Granted, he taught only one class of students for the duration of the year, so I kind of chuckled when I thought about what he would really feel like if he had, oh I don't know 200 students in one school year. Tony (I couldn't help but read it in his voice and expect to read "Moh-nah" at some point!) shares his triumphs: successful projects, the first time he connects with a student in particular; his stumbles: the fights that broke out in his classroom, the time the principal walked in on an unplanned movie; and his struggles: balancing all it takes to teach plus having a family, feeling pulled in every possible direction. With his trademark honesty, Danza paints a beautiful picture of the struggle every public school teacher faces day in and day out while also expressing his sincere appreciation for what we do.
If you are a teacher, you will be reminded why you are in the profession when you read this. If you aren't a teacher, maybe you will be inspired to thank one. We get a lot of bad press these days - testing cover-ups, summer breaks, snow days, promiscuous relationships with students - but please remember that there are a lot of good teachers out there who aren't any of those things. My profession is full of hard-working men and women who get to work early, leave late, wear countless hats for their students, and are truly passionate about their job - not the cash. So why do I teach? Because someone believed in me many years ago and showed me I could change a few lives. I may not be able to change the whole world, but if I can change the way one young person thinks about himself or about math, then it is all worth it.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Sunday, June 7, 2015
foxy for a fat kid
One of my other favorite genres is real-life / memoirs. If it has a touch of coming-of-age, I'm on board. If someone transforms his or her life in the book, take my money - I'm sold! One such book that really did that for me was Andie Mitchell's It Was Me All Along. It was a heartbreaking tale of the author's journey to a new body through extreme weight loss. It really hit home with me, because she finally realized that fat or thin, she was still her all along. What some of you don't know is that I used to be a bit of a #beefytee myself. When I graduated high school, I was nearly 275 pounds; today I am a marathoner and nearly 100 pounds lighter.
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| Left: High School Graduation May 2004 Right: Nashville Marathon April 2015 |
In college, I began really investing in myself and journeyed from a dark place of doubt and real self-loathing to reach a place where I am finally happy with who I am today. It took me a long time, lots of clothes in between, and even a bout with near-anorexia (I was shopping in the kids' section as a 20-year old, y'all) in between, but I am thankful for the journey I have been on and where it has taken me. The real reason you're here though is for this next review.
Another powerful weight loss memoir is Weightless by Gregg McBride, a screenwriter who used to weigh over 450 pounds. Through hard work and exercise, Gregg now weighs 175 pounds and has been at that weight for over a decade! Kudos, Gregg, for real! McBride never backs down from what got him to where he was when he was at his heaviest - disappointment in his own life (a sexually abusive babysitter, an absent father, a mother who told her male suitors he and his sister were adopted?!?) and even details his typical binge meals, leaving me in shock most of the time. He describes the horror of his big-as-they-come pants cutting off his oxygen supply, his belt hanging on by a thread, and the look on potential employers' faces when he showed up for an interview not at all looking like the person they interviewed on the phone. He visits a lot of really deep places emotionally, and boy have I been there. I remember when my belt buckle would literally cut into my belly and cause me to bleed. I remember never being able to get a girlfriend in high school because I was deemed too fat. I remember being scared that I could no longer shop at the mall because the stores didn't carry clothes in my size.
Thankfully, Gregg decided to better his way of life and dropped over 200 pounds in a year - a feat most people thought was due to some miraculous surgery but was in fact all due to healthy eating and increased exercise. He eventually found his ideal weight after a gain and subsequent loss of 100 pounds, but still struggled with his new body. McBride accurately describes finding clothes to hide all the excess skin, the mortification he felt when he heard it all flapping around as he danced for his friends, and his painful decision to have surgery to remove his excess skin. He describes the glee he felt when he was able to shop in the average size section at Gap (cue water works over here - I seriously still remember the first time a small shirt buttoned for me; it was life-altering). Even though he lost over 12 pounds of excess skin from the surgery, I can say with certainty upon hearing about how painful it was and how the scars have affected him that I am glad I haven't had my excess skin removed - it makes me me. While we both struggle with still seeing the fat kid when we look in the mirror, we both know we are in a better place than we were before. While I, like Gregg, know that I will always have to monitor my eating and be mindful of the exercise I get and realize that's a sacrifice, I know that it is one worth making because I am investing in what matters - me.
McBride also includes a bonus section for anyone who is interested in starting his or her own journey of self-transformation. It includes his 4 keys to success, tips on what worked best for him, and recipes for healthier meals to be included with his eating plans. You won't be sorry that you made the sacrifice to better yourself.
4 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Thursday, June 4, 2015
bayou bliss
One of my favorite genres is the thriller. There's something about the weirdness that embodies the story line that reminds me that my life is more normal than I often think it is. While it sometimes makes me a bit paranoid while I run, it's a wonderful escape from the day-to-day chaos of teaching, running, and fundraising. My all-time favorite thriller is Gillian Flynn's masterpiece Gone Girl. Seriously, I have read it three times and seen the movie in the theater (a rare treat in the Doop house), and it still amazes and perplexes me every time. There's something about the "whodunnit" feel plus the he said / she said element that continues to blow my mind.
Another recent thriller that has seen much critical success is Paula Hawkins' The Girl on the Train, in which no one is really sure until the final 30 pages who is guilty. The "twist" at the end is truly remarkable. If thrillers are your thing and you haven't given it a shot, please do me a favor and go to the library today and get added to the request list that will undoubtedly have at least 70 names ahead of you for 3 copies in the whole county. But I digress. If you liked TGOTT, you will love this read.
I recently stumbled upon The First Wife, a new thriller by Erica Spindler, while perusing the covers at the library (confession - a pretty cover draws me in every single time and I am a bit of a cover art snob; this cover was just interesting enough to draw me to the jacket summary). TFW begins with our heroine Bailey waking up in a hospital room, the events of the previous days very hazy in her brain. We are then taken back a few months prior to the Caribbean where she meets Logan; they fall in love hard and fast and get married before returning to his family farm in Louisiana. To say that Logan's family is surprised and angry is an understatement. The least-thrilled individual is his sister Raine; since both of their parents are dead, they are as thick as thieves and she is shocked to have another new woman in her brother's life. It turns out, Logan has been married before to True, who "disappeared" shortly before the book began. The police chief Billy Ray still believes Logan to be responsible for the disappearance / murder as well as several other mysterious disappearances in the area. Billy Ray makes Logan his personal mission because of previous feelings for True, and now Bailey is caught in the middle. Does she trust her husband whom she loves but barely knows, or does she listen to her head and what everyone - and the evidence around her - is telling her? As more disappearances and murders take place, Bailey is in an accident and suffers temporary amnesia, making her recollection of what she knows about the killer foggy and gray. The plot thickens until the killer is finally revealed, and you won't believe who is guilty. Spindler does a wonderful job of immersing the reader in the bayou culture and keeps you guessing until the final turn of the page. I found myself gasping often, as I was truly shocked about the events that unfolded.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Another recent thriller that has seen much critical success is Paula Hawkins' The Girl on the Train, in which no one is really sure until the final 30 pages who is guilty. The "twist" at the end is truly remarkable. If thrillers are your thing and you haven't given it a shot, please do me a favor and go to the library today and get added to the request list that will undoubtedly have at least 70 names ahead of you for 3 copies in the whole county. But I digress. If you liked TGOTT, you will love this read.
I recently stumbled upon The First Wife, a new thriller by Erica Spindler, while perusing the covers at the library (confession - a pretty cover draws me in every single time and I am a bit of a cover art snob; this cover was just interesting enough to draw me to the jacket summary). TFW begins with our heroine Bailey waking up in a hospital room, the events of the previous days very hazy in her brain. We are then taken back a few months prior to the Caribbean where she meets Logan; they fall in love hard and fast and get married before returning to his family farm in Louisiana. To say that Logan's family is surprised and angry is an understatement. The least-thrilled individual is his sister Raine; since both of their parents are dead, they are as thick as thieves and she is shocked to have another new woman in her brother's life. It turns out, Logan has been married before to True, who "disappeared" shortly before the book began. The police chief Billy Ray still believes Logan to be responsible for the disappearance / murder as well as several other mysterious disappearances in the area. Billy Ray makes Logan his personal mission because of previous feelings for True, and now Bailey is caught in the middle. Does she trust her husband whom she loves but barely knows, or does she listen to her head and what everyone - and the evidence around her - is telling her? As more disappearances and murders take place, Bailey is in an accident and suffers temporary amnesia, making her recollection of what she knows about the killer foggy and gray. The plot thickens until the killer is finally revealed, and you won't believe who is guilty. Spindler does a wonderful job of immersing the reader in the bayou culture and keeps you guessing until the final turn of the page. I found myself gasping often, as I was truly shocked about the events that unfolded.
3.5 (of 4) dusty book jackets.
Wednesday, June 3, 2015
welcome
If you know me, you know reading & running are two of my favorite hobbies - besides being an all-around awesome dude. Last year, the Mrs. & I read / listened to 100 books, and we've already amassed 51 this year. We track these on the gram of insta, but I wanted more than an artsy photo of the cover. So that's why you're here (I hope at least). Be on the lookout for reviews and "if you liked this, try this" posts, and maybe a few adoption / life after baby posts if I'm feeling gutsy. Hope you enjoy!
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